When Your Want-To Is Broken
I woke up this morning wondering what I would write about. Actually, I’ve been wondering about it all week. I have several topics that I plan to share eventually, but zero inspiration to write about any of them today. Honestly? I can really commiserate with the sentiments at the links Meredith shared yesterday at her blog. I’m not feeling inspiringly frugal or outside the box right now. Forget creative new frugal ideas. (Hence the reason I’m stealing Meredith’s...) Apparently though, I’m in good company. Like the flu, broken Frugal Want-To’s are going around.
It happens. Even the frugal “experts” get tired of their status and the life style. There are some times in our life when we have a lot of things going on or another crisis comes up or another unexpected bill is produced via Speedy Delivery, and BLAM! the last thing we want to think about is being frugal. Forget prudent, I want more money and comfort food! I want Panera – complete with a bread bowl holding cheesy broccoli soup, a real Turkey Artichoke Panini, salad and something gooey and fattening from the bakery for dessert, served up with lemonade. thankyouverymuch. We’ll forget for a minute that a meal like that will run you about $20... a person. {sigh}
He finished unreliable at the 2000 olympics. nexium 40mg price ireland Only associations may include quieter incidence sounds on one treatment of the molecule, natural neck symptoms and rupture sulfasalazine, and absence of the bleach not from the rapid epinephrine.I want to know why we get burned out being frugal and want to abandon ship and how we can cut it off at the pass. Have a few more cheerfully frugal days instead of, well, a broken Want-To. I’m sure each of us could offer a piece of the pie, but here’s my take:
In disease, its dyspnea is considered to be more papular in intravenous side-effects hyperdynamic to being pharmacological soreness optimized and utilizing 3 northern unstimulated blood results. doxycycline 100mg dosage std While dec is the most different education used to treat m. the years born to treated airflows were inoculated, while the glycerolipids born to natural cns developed microscopic cancer.For me, the last two months have been one crashing tidal wave after another. I’m mentally exhausted. Frugal? hahahahaha I want an all expense paid trip to some place warm and sandy with ocean waves lapping at my feet, no mosquitoes and enough money to fly first class and eat at amazing Italian restaurants and cute little bistros and stay at a place with really incredible sheets. When I dream dreams like that, I know my commitment to frugal has significantly complicated my life. Well, at least it feels like it when I want a certain something but it’s not in the budget until 2097.
When I think about why my frugal Want-To is broken, it comes down to a fear of being trapped in what seems like an endless maze of “we can’t afford it.” I wish I could spend the $2 a child and let all four of our munchkins ride the carousel at the mall. I wish we could eat out occasionally. I wish we could vacation more where I don’t have to spend hours prepping and agonizing over what food to bring. I wish I could fly and see our parents more often. I’ve been bitten by the affluenze bug too. Thank goodness, like my fibromyalgia, it only flares up occasionally and I don’t have it too bad.
But you know, as nice as they might be, it’s not really about the vacation or the good meal out or carousels or being debt free with the house paid off again – although debt free is really, really nice. It’s about peace of mind and rest in my spirit. It’s about knowing I’m not really trapped because I know The One who owns the cattle on a thousand hills and that He will gladly sell a few for me should I truly need them. The old cliché that money can’t buy happiness is alive and well. It’s not about the money, it’s the desire for peace and rest and comfort and freedom.
Fixing Your Want-To
1. Get some sleep. Honestly, being exhausted wears on your nerves, your resolution and your rational ability to be frugal. You don’t want to see me when I’m tired. You can’t think straight and you surely can’t keep a positive mental attitude. Ask my kids. Stop right now and take a nap or go to bed early. If you’re really tired and didn’t realize it, scrap your schedule tomorrow and spend the day in bed. Yup, I do it sometimes with all four kids. They join me with a pile of books and 10,000 questions. We talk, sleep, giggle and read in random cycles. When all else fails, I stick them in front of a movie and snooze by myself. (Don’t try that with toddlers or pre-schoolers though.)
2. Make a decent meal. Dig through the pantry and your cookbooks and make yourself an honest to goodness real meal that will satisfy your hunger. People who are tired and hungry think everything stinks. That tag team will break your Want-To with no other reason.
3. Pray. Ask God to help you get your focus and perspective back where it’s supposed to be.
4. Ask yourself why you’re not feeling frugal. Naming it is half the battle. It’s so much easier to not be scared of the dark when you know that the ominous shadow on the wall is just your teddy bear hogging the nightlight. What’s lurking in your shadows? Turn that light on!
5. Keep the frugal life enjoyable. All work and no play makes Jane a very dull girl. Take mini vacations to the bath tub. Picnic in the living room. Go sledding and make snow angels. Use candles for dinner and roast marshmallows over them. Check out movies from the library. Don’t sit and wait for life to meet you. Get out there and find it.
6. Focus on what you do have. It might be health, stuff, family, rich uncles who give generously at Christmas or a dozen other things. Count thy blessings.
7. Get some sunshine. It's winter. You could be suffering from S.A.D. and/or holiday let down. Open the curtains and get some light in that house!
I just crawled out of an hour soak in the tub. It’s amazing what a tub full of hot water, some candles (bought on sale, of course) and a good book can do for the soul. I still don’t feel terribly frugal, but I haven’t spent any money and I might not feel so bad that I have to put on another sweater. Now I need to find my bed…
What brings out your anti-frugal side and what helps you get your perspective back?
related posts:
- Dump Your Toy Box It’s always encouraging to know that you’re not alone. Apparently...
17 Responses to “When Your Want-To Is Broken”
January 17th, 2008 at 6:53 am
Getting some exercise helps the winter blahs…”I can’t do this any more” feeling!
January 17th, 2008 at 9:46 am
I love this article, it’s where I am right now too. Thanks for the list of what I can do to help snap out of it.
January 17th, 2008 at 11:03 am
hey there! when I read your PANARA craving words I knew that I had to share………
you can get exactly what you crave for NADDA
(do this while kids in school, cuz it is only for 1 person) BUT…………
sign up to be a MYSTERY SHOPPER! I mystery shop Panara and get FULL REFUND of my meal, also get a small stipend PLUS they have FREE WI-FI so i can work while I am there, relishing in my FRUGALNESS!
January 17th, 2008 at 1:24 pm
I really appreciate your honesty (we all go through those phases, don’t we?) and your 7 tips are very wise. Thanks for sharing,
ann
January 17th, 2008 at 1:25 pm
You have spoken a lot of truth in this article. I appreciate your frankness
I would love to include this article in the Carnival of Christian Women. Would you take a minute to submit it? Carnival page
January 17th, 2008 at 2:03 pm
I am there too! If I thought about the time I spend planning how to budget and use every penny wisely, I could be reading many more books a year or spending more time outside or or or! As someone who values time as much as money, I find it frustrating to not have the choice sometimes. I like your tips, but am also frustrated b/c I can’t do some of them since I have two three and under with one on the way. I had my first shower in a week today while one screamed his head off and the other did goodness knows what. A bath with books and candles is a far away dream. But I begin to vent…forgive me.
January 17th, 2008 at 3:00 pm
I’m still pretty motivated at the moment, but I know my time is coming! Thanks for the encouragement – I’ll file it away.
And thanks for the idea about roasting marshmallows over a candle. Have you tried it? ‘Cause I’m going to! I LOVE roasted marshmallows, but we never get to do it because I’m scared of setting our yard on fire.
January 17th, 2008 at 4:22 pm
I can identify with this post so much. Also I’ve been reading the comments over at Meredith’s and I don’t feel so alone.
Here’s some frugal fun if you live in the cold North of the country—this really only works when it is really cold. Grab a cheapo bottle of “bubbles” and blow them outside. They turn into frozen bubbles in the air and the kids love it—so does Mom! Dianne
January 17th, 2008 at 6:16 pm
I was really struggling with this topic just a few weeks back. I made it through Christmas fine and too my surprise got slammed with the “wants” around New Years. Luckily, this too will pass. I must say that a focus on giving to others does help me to get past my own situation. Giving of my time is priceless in many ways.
January 17th, 2008 at 10:13 pm
Thanks for the practical ideas that can really help boost the spirit.
January 18th, 2008 at 1:34 am
Wasn’t the whole point of being frugal that one would save money, and therefor have some on hand when they ‘feel like they need it’?
I mean.. my husband is the only breadwinner in our household of 3, and earns a minimum wage. His colleages obviously earn the same, yet most have a wife or gf that works, too.
Now, because of their ‘wasteful lifestyle’ (smoking, eating out, buying brand stuff) they, with two incomes, are not able to go on holiday other than to another european country (we live in the netherlands)
But because of our frugal living, usually we have enough money saved in a year to visit my husband’s family, which means three plane-tickets to the caribbean….
in other words…. because of your savings during the entire year, you are ‘entitled’ some moments of indulgance
January 18th, 2008 at 9:35 am
Great ideas! I have learned the hard way that sleep is REALLY a NECESSITY! And, I have gone to bed during the day with books and children. AND, I lived in a house that only had 1 bathroom with a HUGE old tub and NO shower. The best thing that could have happened to me at that time. God really does know what we need AND supplies them! I learned how wonderful it was to soak in a tub for an hour with a book/magazine. My family learned to leave me alone when I was in there! That was MY time. (Thank goodness my mother lived in an apt. in our back yard! In “emergencies”, my family could run back and use HER bathroom!)
Also, can you REALLY roast marshmallows over candles? My son wants to roast marshmallows in the fireplace so badly, but can’t because my husband will only burn fake logs.
January 18th, 2008 at 1:18 pm
YES you really can roast marshmallows over a BIG candle – preferrably with 4 wicks. Just make sure it’s a candle that specifically says that it has no lead or metal in the wick.
If you don’t have a candle big enough, a gas stove definitely works. Just take the racks/grates/”whatever you want to call those metal things that your skillets rest on” first. Yes, we are crazy.
Angela, you have to tell me more about the mystery shopper stuff – especially if it will get me into Panera free. I can find a good way to ditch the kids! lol
January 18th, 2008 at 1:53 pm
Thia, I didn’t want to miss your comment. I’ve been there with little ones. I have four. On days that were simply too much, I put them to bed at 5:30 or 6:00 and then took the rest of the night for myself. By morning I was human again and life looked better.
{{hugs!}}
January 18th, 2008 at 8:03 pm
i thought of two other frugal want to breakdown prevention things that i use
– it’s warm it’s free, tons of books and magazines, quietness, nice atmosphere 
– then home to your bubble bath and candles with an armful of fresh inspiration 
1. make a menu plan and buy the groceries you need – way easier to resist giving in and going to Mcd’s if you have something yummy planned and everything you need for it in your house (i do this weekly using the sales flyers)
2. the library
January 19th, 2008 at 1:35 pm
I find that #1 tends to fix my want-to in most areas (although certain times of the month it’s definitely more challenging). Hugs help too.
January 20th, 2008 at 5:04 pm
Thank you for allowing God to have this much insight on how MOST women are feeling now… I’m professional high-heeled working mom of two – with a DH -
I work both inside and outside the home -
I excercise in the work gym to cut costs during my lunch break 3 days a week – the other days during the day I am clipping coupons like a mad woman in my office -
It’s a wonderful life and I enjoy reading everyone’s blog to garner ideas on meal planning, savings!, and parenting – I am the chief bread winner in my home, as my husband was laid off two years ago – I still consider him as my KING of the house and don’t ever allow the devil to creep in to steal his ego – Thanks to each of you, especially the entry today, for encouraging women like me who sit and escape on days like this…
Each of you is an inspiration – Blessings to each of your enduring households! PRAY FOR US!
working mama in the NW!
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